What Would Buddy Do?
Someone call Anton Chigurh, Peter King is feeling lucky
Posted on March 3rd, 2008 at 11:42 pm by Cheesesteak Hoagie

see you at EWRIt’s been a while since we’ve assigned a bounty to an Enemy of Freedom (that is, someone who dares speak ill of the Birds and isn’t actually a fan of the team). But a little item in Peter King’s MMQB column reminded me of the reason I started this web site in the first place: to anonymously defame those who insult the honor of my favorite NFL team (as well as proffer the occasional empty threat).

While this isn’t the first time we’ve singled out Peter King, his column today makes it clear that we must redouble our efforts if we ever hope to thwart him for good. Specifically, he takes time off from commenting on the flatulence of his fellow airline travelers to write:

Quote of the Week II
“I just want to be able to win and get back to the Super Bowl.”

–Philadelphia cornerback Asante Samuel, who got $20 million guaranteed in a six-year, $57 million contract with the Eagles on Friday.

If that’s what was most important, then why didn’t Samuel stay with New England? Does he, or his agent, really think the Eagles have a better shot to get back to the Super Bowl than the Patriots in the next two or three years?

Well allow me to retort!

Does Peter King really presuppose that the Pats are more likely to contend for the Super Bowl in the next 2-3 years? How could he possibly know this? With the impact of injuries, free agency, and coaching changes shaking up the league every year, how can you really predict anything past the coming season? And when you factor in the Spygate risk premium, I mean, yikes. Who knows what’s going to happen in New England?

(Similarly, who knows what’s going to happen in Philly. But we accept that — which is why we think it’s ridiculous to project too far into the future.)

For his blind slurpinig of the Pats and hateful snub of the Birds, we hereby increase Peter King’s bounty. Peter, I look forward to sitting next to you on a future Continental flight! I’ll be the one passed out and farting all over you.

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