What Would Buddy Do?
I too long to make light of my coworkers’ emotional problems
Posted on August 11th, 2008 at 10:41 pm by Cheesesteak Hoagie


Decent showing from Matt Mosley’s NFC East blog (which I’d found a bit forgettable to date) this afternoon.  Not only did he manage to get a T.O. quote out of Dunavin (Why we gotta be bringin up old sh*t?), but he got Jon Runyan to speak ill of Shawn Andrews:

Runyan wants to believe that Andrews is truly sincere about suffering from depression, but something doesn’t seem right about it.

“It’s hard to believe it because I know how he is,” Runyan said. “Knowing him, he could be playing a joke on all of us….”

Runyan said that Andrews apologized to the team, but even that didn’t impress the veteran player.

“He apologized a little bit, but if you’re truly sick, what should you have to apologize for?”

There are a lot of ways that being an NFL player is different than, say, going to my job every day.   One of those ways appears to be that you can publicly question the mental health diagnosis and condition of coworkers.  (Read the rest of this story.)

And we’re back: BountyBowl narrowly beats Shawn Andrews in return to civilization
Posted on August 10th, 2008 at 9:48 pm by Cheesesteak Hoagie


Well hello!

Back on the scene after a lovely little vacation, a few grams heavier on my left side, but otherwise unscathed.  Great week off, but it’s pretty chill to be back. 

So what’d I miss?

When we last spoke, I hoped my absence would produce a Brian Westbrook contract, a Shawn Andrews answer, and an absence of injuries.  Pretty much 3-for-3, though it turns out that I got back slightly before Andrews.  Still, we’ll take it.  I missed the preseason game, and have only the highlights and a 48-hour news cycle to go on, but it sounds like things have been pretty appropriately mellow in and around the Birds. 

Still, I’ll need to catch up on what I’ve missed: (Read the rest of this story.)

Shawn Andrews: Flakegate Day 4
Posted on July 27th, 2008 at 11:52 am by Cheesesteak Hoagie

dance fat man dance

We’re now on the fourth day of the Shawn Andrews unexcused-absence-but-not-because-of-a-contract-dispute subplot.  The absence of any legit details on the story renders the whole thing a bit dull.  What we know: Andrews told Andy Reid that he wasn’t coming to camp on Thursday, his agent insists it isn’t about money, and no one is saying anything interesting (or really anything at all) about whatever the hell is going on with Andrews.

Of course, Shawn Andrews being Shawn Andrews (that is, one of the most underappreciated headcases/ space cadets on the team), there’s a decent chance that this holdout is actually not just about money (and might be about something completely ridiculous).  Shawn Andrews does like talking about his sensitive little feelings.

Also, I’m finding it semi-curious that none of the players have really commented on the situation, though most were willing to at least offer a “That’s his business” in re: BWest’s threatened holdout.  And Andy Reid seemed a bit short about it as well.  I dunno.  Why doesn’t someone call his brother (plays for the Benglas, right?).  It all seems a little more odd than average.

Thus, in the absence of any real data, I’m going to irresponsibly speculate about the reasons for the holdout; my hypotheses, in order of actual likelihood (as in, most likely to not-in-a-zillion-years): (Read the rest of this story.)

Pro Bowl props via the splash page
Posted on December 19th, 2007 at 11:33 am by Cheesesteak Hoagie

More real-time goodness from the PhiladelphiaEagles.com staff with a Pro-Bowl-themed splash page honoring Shawn Andrews and Brian Westbrook.

Good stuff — nice to see Dave Spadaro’s boys on the web staff working hard for their 43K/ year.


Better hurry up, Shawn Andrews needs to poop
Posted on October 15th, 2007 at 6:15 pm by Cheesesteak Hoagie

you have no idea how bloatedThe 700 Level stole my thunder on this one, but since I was an early adopter on the Shawn-Andrews-is-goofy meme, I feel like I get to double-post this one.

If you have a moment, definitely look up the Shawn Andrews post-game video from the Jets game on PhiladelphiaEagles.com, in which Andrews explains that he was happy the game didn’t go to overtime since he had “eaten a lot that weekend” and was feeling “bloated.”

Attaguy, big fella. We’re all friends here, feel free to share those details. Circle of trust, circle of trust.

Eagles-Jets postgame, Shawn Andrews [PhiladelphiaEagles.com]

Official prognostication in re: wins and losses
Posted on September 9th, 2007 at 8:26 am by Cheesesteak Hoagie

The 36 chambers of Brian WestbrookThe short answer is that I think the Eagles are going to win the Super Bowl.

(I say this every year, and you can check my old blog if you’re not convinced. I say, put it in writing, wager on it, etc etc. I’m — unfortunately — something of a true believer w/r/t the Eagles’ Super Bowl chances each year since, oh, about the age of fifteen.)

But if you really want my slightly less partial opinion, (Read the rest of this story.)

Shawn Andrews returns, shows mischievous side
Posted on September 4th, 2007 at 9:42 pm by Cheesesteak Hoagie

oh i was only kidding about all thatI really had no idea that Shawn Andrews would become the breakout media star of training camp.

With a string of space cadet quotes (we might even suggest that they are Randall-esque!), Andrews has already established himself to be a go-to player for enterprising blathermonkeys looking for a goofy/ semi-controversial quote. Just weeks after declaring that his visit to a doctor in re: his ankle had been a real “tear-jerker,” today he declared himself to be in good health and insisted that his earlier, ahem, more emotional comments had been part of some sort of cunning ruse designed to deceive the assembled blathemonkeys:

(Read the rest of this story.)

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